Section 2
A. FROM DEATH THROUGH BURIAL
As noted in this guide’s introduction, traditional Judaism has thoughtfully developed a series of practices whose overall purpose is to honor the dead and comfort the grieving. The next two sections of the guide will take the reader through those steps in chronological sequence, first for the person who has died and then for the mourners.
Traditional Jewish practices for the period immediately after death take their lead from the book of Genesis: “From dust you are, and to dust you shall return” (Genesis 3:19). In keeping with this verse and others, a series of steps have been prescribed for treating the body, which is to be buried quickly and returned without adornment to the earth.
FIRST QUESTIONS: ORGAN DONATIONS AND AUTOPSIES
Two of the first questions medical staff will ask the person responsible for decisions are whether the deceased’s organs are to be donated and whether the hospital may perform an autopsy. The person responsible for answering these questions normally will be the agent the deceased has designated.
Organ Donation: The Conservative Movement’s Committee on Jewish Law and Standards considers post-mortem organ donation a positive mitzvah or obligation. For more details on organ donation, follow this link to Section 1A of this guide.
Autopsies: If an autopsy is proposed, you should consult with the Rabbi. According to the Rabbinical Assembly, “The practice of routine autopsies is contrary to Jewish law…. In cases where the law requires an autopsy, it should be carried out under the supervision of a Rabbi who is familiar with the procedures.”
CEMETERIES AND FUNERAL HOMES
Among the other early tasks is to determine where the deceased will be buried and which licensed funeral director will handle the arrangements. You will need to determine whether the family already owns an available burial site, determine whether the deceased wished to be buried there, and provide a deed. The funeral home will coordinate arrangements for burial and any graveside service, coordinating with the clergy you have selected. For more information on cemeteries and funeral homes, see the earlier discussion in Section IC of this guide.
COLLECTING AND PREPARING THE BODY
When a death occurs in a hospital, nursing home, or hospice, the facility will notify the next of kin and authorize transfer to a funeral home. When a death occurs at home, call 911. Paramedics, the New York Police Department, or the Office of the Chief Medical Examiner will respond.
Directly after (or in anticipation of) a person’s death, a person responsible for these matters should notify a funeral home as well as the synagogue. (See the Preface for what the synagogue will need. If the deceased has not made plans with a funeral home in advance, two geographically convenient ones used by several Habonim members are listed in Section IC under “Funeral Homes."
As its first step, a funeral home will collect the deceased’s body from the place of death, whether or not traditional Jewish practices are to be followed. From here onward, we assume a traditional Jewish funeral.
In a traditional Jewish funeral, the funeral home:
- Prepares the body following the practice of taharah – ritual cleansing of the body.
- Dresses the body in a simple white, linen garment (Hebrew: tachrichim). No makeup, jewelry, or other adornment is worn on the body. Tallit (with fringes cut) may be placed with the body.
- Provides shomrim (guardians) until the funeral. Shomrim read Psalms, keeping the body company.
- Refrains from embalming or otherwise preserving the body.
- Provides a coffin. The coffin should be made of a simple biodegradable material – most often a plain pine box – without lining or nails.
- Does not leave the coffin open for viewing.
- Several of these steps involve fees. New York law requires funeral homes to make their itemized fees available in advance to the public. This is often done on the funeral home’s website.
THE FUNERAL SERVICE AND BURIAL
Under Jewish tradition, the funeral service and burial take place as quickly as possible, sometimes even the day following the death of the deceased. We do not bury our dead on Shabbat or major Jewish holy days. What follows is an outline of the typical service:
- Before the service, those deemed mourners by the tradition (see below) participate in the ritual of kriah – the tearing of a garment or ribbon to represent the tearing of one's heart at this time of loss.
- The funeral service includes the recitation of psalms, eulogies/words of memory (hesped in Hebrew) offered by friends and family, the memorial prayer/El Maleh Rachamim, and often Mourner's Kaddish.
- Those in attendance rise as the casket containing the deceased is escorted out of the chapel and to the hearse for transport to the cemetery. Family and friends chosen in advance may serve as honorary pallbearers to escort the casket out of the room.
- After arrival at the cemetery and attention to administrative requirements, all in attendance join the procession to the burial site. Often the casket is placed immediately into the ground at which time the burial service begins. All in attendance are encouraged to participate in the burial, returning earth to the ground to cover the casket. Burying the dead is a significant mitzvah in Judaism. Some families choose to fill the entire grave.
- The memorial prayer/El Maleh Rachamim and Mourner's Kaddish follow the burial.
- When space and the number of comforters allow, those in attendance form two rows. As the mourners walk through the rows supported by the presence of community, the community offers words of comfort from our tradition, hamakom yinachem etchem b'tokh sh’ar avaylei tzion v'yirushalayim/may the holy one comfort and strengthen you among the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.
- At a graveside service, the elements of the funeral service and burial are folded together.
Cremation: The following excerpt is quoted from the Rabbinical Assembly’s Guide: “4.3 Cremation – Cremation is against Jewish tradition and the family of the deceased should be so advised by the Rabbi."
SEE THE APPENDIX FOR ADDITIONAL READINGS AND RESOURCES
